Friendships are always a big struggle for me. On one hand, I feel rejected a lot by others. On the other hand, I know I don't always do the necessary, socially expected things to make and keep friendships (calling, bringing things over to others, being the one to say hi when seeing someone I know in public, etc.). Anyhow, Kimmie @ Over The Moon With Joy has written about struggling with friendships as well. It got me thinking and here is what I wrote to Kimmie. This is where my heart is at in regards to friendships. I hope I make an effort to become a better friend to others in the future.
Friendships are hard. Especially for introverts and especially for creative types. I think sometimes too we have such false beliefs about our friendships (as women) - that this friend is to be this, this, and this for me. Maybe it is only God's plan for her to be this one thing for me. And maybe, being my personality, that I know doesn't tend to make friendships easily, maybe I need to not think more realistically and not think every friendship I have to get back exactly what I give. Maybe God has called me to give more than I recieve and be OK with that. And to realize that what I give won't always be appreciated, but I serve as unto the Lord, anyhow. Also, maybe I need to realize, God put this friend in my life, only to fill this small little area and as I yield to him he'll reveal other friends in my life to fill these other areas. Ultimately, I am so thankful to God to allow me to spend my life with my best friend, my husband, anyhow. And while my husband doesn't fill every need (and sometimes I freak out about that), he fills the really deep needs and God provides for other needs as I yield to him and allow myself to give to others freely. Well, just rambling about my own experience. I look forward to reading more about what your are learning in this area. My prayers are with you.